Boundaries And Respect. Courage to be loving and kind In challenging Situations
We’ve all experienced it, uncomfortable challenging situations, whether that is negotioing for our needs i.e. like asking for a pay increase at work, or asking a partner to respect your boundaries. These types of situations usually people try to avoid or end up people pleasing so as not to experience the discomfort, the love and courage it takes to not be defensive, to not be offensive, to dialogue and to be open. And in all honesty it can be sometimes challenging:
Your mind can make it seem challenging to experience what might be considered uncomfortable situations.
Your body may experience withdrawal and discomfort from experiencing these types of conversations. And would rather seek safety and familiarity.
You may not be open to dialoguing due to fear of discomfort
You may not be willing to let go of your own selfish desires/motives to be open to what the experience will bring that will be beneficial for all.
You may not know how to be open, loving, kind and respectful whilst having challenging conversations. You need to be honest with ourself, and then discover/encounter/experience/learn how to consciously be open, loving, kind and respectful whilst experiencing challenging situations.
It all seems so simply explained when you read this, but most times most of us are not practicing or living this way. We end up people pleasing, not having healthy boundaries, being defensive, being attacking and mostly loose consciousness, which can make us lash out at ourselves and/or others when our boundaries and values have been overly crossed, taken down and disrespected.
We blame others and ourselves sometimes for being exploited and/or disrespected, whilst in reality it is our own responsibility to ensure we communicate clearly to others what our values, needs, ideas and ways are, and also listen to other people’s needs and requirements so we can all coexist in a loving and kind way, and come to a clear understanding and agreement of what will benefit all.
It is generally possible to step up, show up from a place of love and respect, to converse and dialogue with others especially for areas you may find challenging to talk about. Or usually difficult situations, most challenges come from our sometimes selfish needs to have our needs met. What If you can let go of the idea to have all that you want? And go into a dialogue with an open heart and love, with respect for all and kindness. From my experience miraculously we all get what we need, deserve and it benefits all. It is truly a magical way to live and experience life. It is freeing and frees others to come as they are without judgement, defensiveness or attacking, and it opens up many possibilities for what may come out of the challenging situations/dialogues.
So I am encouraging you, to step in and give it a gentle try, when next the opportunity presents itself for you to address what you may find a challenging conversation or situation, go in with the mindset of pure Divine unconditional love, respect, kindness and an openness to be a conscious participant in the dialogue/experience, to let go of the idea of what you want from it whilst being present for your needs/values/desires. Listen to other people’s opinions, needs, wants and values from a place of respect, love and kindness. And consciously respond from there. May we all be free of pain and suffering.
If you would like to explore, learn, live and understand some of the concepts discussed here in depth, then please book a free 30 minutes call here
https://queenoluwatobiloba.as.me/schedule/c1131139/appointment/38786489/calendar/7364366?appointmentTypeIds%5B%5D=38786489
Pure Divine Unconditional Love Always
Queen Oluwatobiloba
